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Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Hair Cut Stages

Every Hair cut is done in the following stages-

Stage 1- You skim through all the styles in the catalogue- most of them with firang faces and imagine how each will look on you.

Stage 2- Give up and ask the stylist to guide you, giving your overall preferences which would normally be - desired length and whether you want something new or same cut.

Stage 3- The stylist advices you and describes a style that is suspiciously similar to the current one, even though they give a different name or bring out the subtle differences between current and future intended style.

Stage 4- You either agree to the intended cut murmuring a small prayer to the Almighty or command- just maintain the same style.

Stage 5- This is the most important & also dicey stage- the stylist clutches a small fraction of your hair and you watch in the mirror as he indicates this is the length he or she will remove. Now as objects appear closer than they really are in the car rearview mirror, hair length appears shorter than they really are in salon mirrors. If you agree to the visible length to be cut, mentally add atleast 10% to it for your hair will be shortened more than it's seen.

Stage 6- Washing/ Conditioning- fairly harmless

Stage 7- Cutting- fairly harmless again as long as you don't die in shock at the length of the hair cut off and don't panic and stop your stylist in the middle of the cutting. As they say, if r@pe is inevitable, just lie back and enjoy it, you leave everything to the Almighty & the stylist in question- knowing/ rather forcing yourself to believe that (s)he knows his/ her job the best and you the owner of the now fallen locks ought not to interfere in the process.

Stage 8- Drying- this is the stage when the stylist will comment how frizzy your hair looks and how your hair could benefit greatly using a particular brand of shampoo or conditioner. And then the said stylist will graciously add that since your hair is not so damaged, it's ok if you use just the conditioner- (see how much I have reduced your expenses by suggesting you take only the conditioner)

Stage 9- Reality Strikes- you look at yourself in the mirror, they hold a small mirror helpfully behind you so that you can see the lovely bounce in the back side but you may or may not end up looking as hot & glam as you imagined.

Stage 10- Escape- This is where you make a dash for it before the stylist weilds the promised conditioner bottle. If you shuffle your heels even a little, you are forced to go to ...

Stage 11- Where the stylist bring the bottle to you- which will normally be the one the salon is forced to use by the corporate decision makers, reads out all the benefits and hand you the bottle. You will look at it, read the labels armed with new found knowledge and then look up into the expectant face of the stylist willing you to ask you how much? Now this is not going to come cheap. If you are ok with it- ask for the price else just say not today,s ometime later and make a dash for it- before you register the disappointed look in the stylist's eyes.


The point of this post- I got a new haircut and while hubby laughed at me, I think I am liking it- It's getting better as the oodles of conditioner that was put is wearing off.

8 comments:

Monika said...

Lol......with me the last stage is not bad at all & after all the blow drying & styling, one does look good......the most dreadful thing happens after the first wash at home coz u just don't get the hair to stay in place as they should !
Glad u r liking your new haircut :)

Mama - Mia said...

true true!!

mine always looks the same,but still i feel good for the first few days till the setting done by the stylists is gone!! :p

i alos said sometime later maybe and made a dash and thankfully my stylist never asked me again! ;)

loved the post!

cheers!

abha

Minka said...

No photo ? We don't get to vote ?!! this is not democracy .

At least you had the guts to get a haircut. When I finally steel myself and get to the stylist, I am reminded that I have thinning and countable strands of hair on my head and am encouraged to invest first in massage and hair packs and I finally end up just asking for a trim and beat a hasty retreat

Anonymous said...

Sigh ... I have been to hair salons in 3 different cities in the last 2 years - but come back with the same cut .... I just dont get it. Stubborn hair, may be. I am glad you like your cut.

Anonymous said...

I actually once asked the stylist what conditioner she uses, and bought it! And since then, I have always bought that same conditioner! I know, I am nuts :(

On the other hand, my hair does get extremely dry in winter and tangles awfully and that's when I am at my most desperate :)

BangaloreMom said...

So true ITW, so very true...

Alan said...

I go to the barber. She says, "the usual?" I say, "Yes the usual". Ten minutes and we're done.

Sukhaloka said...

I go to the cheapo parlour in the neighbourhood, tell them "trim off the split ends, keep the cut". They do it, and sniff that I have dry hair and so many split ends. I pay them Rs 50 to 70. Done.

BTW, anyone who has read Alexander Pope would call this post "The Rape of the Lock"!