Wildlife Sighting

At IIT Campus.
Visiting the campus was like reliving the good old days of my own campus life. It was like as if an alternate universe existed just away from the hustle and bustle of city life.
I am glad I have lived a life like this once upon a time.
Congregations outside the library or canteens or outside classes.
Walking up from hostel to class and back. As MBAs we were the priviledged lot of being allowed entry into the boys hostel which was a matter of great annoyance to girls of other streams. Not that we utilized that priviledge at all. I mean why would we want to visit the boys messy hostel? And look at the gamchas and chuddies drying outside?
It would have been an overdose of their company after spending class hours with them.
But that didnt deter us from throwing this fact into the other girls faces and watch them go green.
Sigh!

What is your campus memories?

Sent from my Nokia phone

Garbage Garbage

Chennai city has never looked dirtier than what it is now. After the Government takeover of the corporation, one can find garbage dumped all over the streets. Places that had never been garbage dumps before are being used as spots to dump litter.
The garbage collection guys don't come any more. Dustbins remain overturned or overflowing.
The shame of the city is in full view.
Anyway, heard that a private firm has taken it up on piecemeal basis. Let's see how they fare.

Meanwhile, check out these stories of hope and experiments on this site on solving the garbage problem.

Pertinent Questions

1. I leave home anytime between 7.45 - 8.00 am. And the husband's car leaves home after 2.00 pm. What compels the car cleaning guy to clean the husband's car first and then mine. Just the fact that his car is parked 1st in the peking order?

2. Who, I ask who the F is crapping in the building lift every morning? Rather why is he doing it there- I am pretty sure it is a he.

3. What makes people do exactly the opposite of what instructions have been given?

4. What makes people blame the kids even if the mistake is theirs?

5. Why is the neighbour's kid always punching the other kids in the stomach? And most importantly why is the mother not bothered to correct the child?

6. What causes people to hoard obviously useless stuff? One person's trash is other person's treasure and all that being true but some stuff has so obviously lost their usefulness that the best place for them is the trash box. Especially nowadays, when space is a constraint.

7. Why am I always short of 5 minutes in the morning?

8. Can't people use common sense? Or if that is too much of an effort, can't they read the notices in the toilets- Do not throw tissues in the toilet- throw them in the dustbin?

Beware the Blogger Observes- Passport Office

1. Just give the tokens- don't keep randomly screaming- move move, be in queue- the security will do that.

2. Just because the rest of us are not in the queue reserved for the elderly, it does not mean we do not want to sit while we wait. That too if the waiting time is 1 hour plus for just the counters to open.

3.You watchmen- your only duty is to come every 20 minutes and pull the plastic chairs from under our butts and ask us- what is your age? You can sit only if you are in Queue E.

4. So you are used to coming in at 9.40 am to open the counters. Doesn't at all look like a logical opening time. Why can't you guys see that there are people waiting from as early as 6.00 am.

5. Ah there you are. Sauntering in at 10.45 am. Thank God you are responsible for the elderly people queue- Atleast they are not standing like us.

6. Yup I am standing in the queue reading my book. I would like to have some peace. Why the hell are you buzzing in my ears speaking loudly in an annoying monotone. Just a decibel louder than sound designated as background noise.

7. Would you care to be a little quicker than what you are? We do not have all the time in the world. The next queue is on number 10 and you are still on number 6. even though you came just 5 minutes after the next counter clerk.

8. And yes, you who are the number 10 in my queue- even if you stand right in front, you cannot go ahead of us. The token numbers are called and you need to go as per that.

9. Just because she is burkha clad as you are, I will not assume that both of you are together. So doesn't make sense pressing against her in the queue and squeezing me out of my rightful place in the queue- which is between both of you.

10. And no. I will not be squeezed out. I will elbow my way in and sweetly and innocently ask you- are both of you together?

11. And of course I feel cheated being in the cattle class queue for payments. After going quickly through tatkal queue.

12. Where were you when God was installing the brains? Do you really think you can park in the path intended for vehicles to drive out of the parking lot?

13. Arre jugaad ki bhi hadd ho gayee? You are collecting additional Rs 5 per car parking token for tea?

As usual- crediting this genere of posting to kiran.

Lost in Translation

I desperatley tried to convey the words- "Ask him to mind his own business", in Tamil via the electrician + Plumber + office boy of the building

What really got translated- Madam has asked him to go to office and work.

The joke is that this guy has his own business and works largely from home!

Height of Not Branding

Setting- A Meeting scene in a Tamil Serial.
The tables have water bottles arranged for the participants.
They went to great lengths to ensure there is no advertising.
7 Aquafina bottles with labels carefully removed were arranged for the particpants!

Baby Nursery Room

For parents who would like to have ideas for their nursery - here is a lovely site. Maybe it has come a little late in the day for me still, since R who handles the site asked me so nicely, I am glad to oblige. and after all it is a lovely site. I liked the safety section and also there is a section on baby showers- since we play doulas so often, it would be nice to have a resource which pumps in fresh ideas for us!

Check out the nursery themes also.
Now if only there was an Indian connect also!

Trying for Size

Mamma- whose shirt is this? yours or Dadda's?
Tejas picks up t he shirt, shakes it open and holds it against himself. Looks at it critically and says- Dadda's!!


Me clearing my shelf- I come across a silk top smallish looking and wonder- whose is this?
I look at the size- S- definitely cannot be mine

I happen to see the age- 3-4 years
The penny drops

What Happens When I Hear a Certain Type of News?

My limbs begin to shake, a sick feeling begins to start at the pit of my stomach, I lose focus in my work, I break up into a cold sweat and an extreme weariness takes over my entire self.
Yes, this happens the moment I hear that the maid is not coming.
I have reached a certain stage in my life when the tone of the entire day depends upon the arrival of this all important person in life- the maid. Until she comes, I have something nagging at the back of my head. Every happy episode of the day like coming to know the bonus figures or getting a surprise phone call from the kids seems to be clouded by something. Until I hear that the maid is safely inside the house happily working and banishing the dirt demons of the house. Then on, the day seems bright and sunshiny and I appreciate the joy in the little little pleasures of life-like a gulabjamun served at the office lunch or simply completing the task of a bill payment.
I am an total disaster when the maid goes away. I curse, I cry, I fume, I scream at every available person or non person.
I then use all resources to hunt for availabe maid- anyone who is willing to do just dishes. I call friends, neighbours, maids who have phones. I beg, cajole and follow up if they agree to come which is not very often.
Then I collect myself and begin to say to self- ah well, atleast she will be back tomorrow or the day after. Atleast it is not permanent. Just do it today. I then go about the laborious task of attacking dirty dishes, washing clothes and say to myself thank God I have a machine, scrub sink tops and say to myself atleast because the maid is not there, the sink top is looking cleaner. The husband vacuums- ah another positive- atleast the house gets to have the monthly vacuuming done because of her absence. And after that initial starting prolem, on pure inertia I do the jhaadoo, pocha, bartan, kapda the next day and the next until the maid madam arrives.
And I vow to myself, never again will I let myself get into this situation.
And so the hunt for the second maid begins. She will be my back up. A lower salary one. The one who comes early morning and does atleast half the job. The one who will go the extra mile if the second one takes leave. The one who will never take leave without informing me. Or rather, will never take leave. The one who will live at walking distance, will have a phone and will come even if I call her to work at odd hours. Basically, she will be accessible at all times, all days, round the year. Even though I do not need her. I just want her to be there. Eventually she will become my main maid and the current one will become a back up and I, from this position of power, will negotiate with her on her awful timings, or chores that she gives a miss or even cut her salary if she takes too many leaves.

But it is not easy.
My Standard Operating Protocol for Maid Hunt
1. Spread the word- talk to the maid encyclopedia of the building- the one who knows about every available maid, the building maid, the neighbour's maid, iron wallah, security, fish waali who has the advantage of knowing about maids in other buildings.
2. Go from flat to flat staring at their doorstep- if there is a pair of chappals which are likely to be a maid's, ring the bell even if you have never ever spoken to the occupants before. Ask for the maid without preamble. Because- they understand how it is like to be maidless. But, don't say you want their maid to work- say you want to ask their maid to find someone- because maid poaching is another feared thing- some people clam up the moment you say words to that effect. The drill is same when you speak to the maid- give flat number, timing when you need a maid, give a brief overview of the work load and extract a promise from her that she will bring her friend to work for you, then pray for the miracle.
3. Stare at every possible person in the vicinity. If they look like a maid- accost them.
4. Follow up- with 1 & 2 & 3 above.
5. Now when a maid comes you need to judge- do you tell the entire workload and fix upfront or just give a sketch and as she enters your home give additional responsibility and may be increase the salary thereby. Do you straightaway come to a final figure or negotiate upwards. Remember, there is no sure shot here. Some walk away the moment they hear the figure and you will never feel like calling them back even if you had a higher budget, while some will negotiate. Some name their price while others wait for you to open your trap then size you up.
6. Even if one agrees to come and work, the story does not end. They may not turn up and you lose a day and a half worth of maid hunt. So keep the search on even then.
7. Even if they join work, there is no guarantee that they will last the month even. Believe me, I have changed 6 last year and have already experienced 2 this month alone. Therefore, rinse, repeat until you get a feeling that the new one has settled.
8. And as you begin to have good thought for her and start thinking of giving her a big bonus inspite of she not completing even a year of service, or start thinking of giving her a hike as she completes a year, or plan to give her some more work because, after all, the workload isn't as much as you initially spoke of- she throws a googly and quits.
9. Rinse, repeat 1-8.
10. Now a word of caution- never hire 2 people from the same family- if someone dies or someone is born, both will take leave at the same time. Also, even if with each passing maidless day you increase your walkaway salary for the new maid, the next one will throw a figure which is phenomenally higher. No matter how much impatient you are to hire, never hire someone if you plan to throw her out eventually after you get a better one- her gang of friends will never let you hire another one and you will be stuck with her ultimately.

My Views on Women's Day

errrr

Forget it, I am just not cut out for writing such stuff. Instead let me just write what I did today which I do anyway irrespective of it being women's day or not.

Just wore a nice dress with this jazzy dupatta which made me feel instantly good about myself...

...because I was going out for lunch with friend AD.

We did lunch - where else- at Barbecue Nation and stuffed our faces until full.

In the evening, I am meeting another friend NS- funny thing is that it is more like a playdate- and funny because all our life we have been having so called play dates with each other and now we are doing the same with our children.

And I am also reading Jaane Bhi Do Yaaron and appreciating the making of a well loved comedy.

A Good Month with a Little Anti Jinx Thrown In

February this year has been very kind to me. It looks like I have done so many things this month, so many doors opened, so many things that I had been waiting for has happened, and that too very suddenly, after nearly 2 months of waiting, in a flash- like some blocked valve getting cleared.

When I posted passing thoughts in the beginning of the month, I talked about the waiting game.

So yes, the valve got unplugged and the waiting game did get over. I received my Nokia N8 and what a phone it is. A 12 Mega Pixel camera which we happily used without removing the film and since conviction is more important than the proof that we see- we swore by the picture quality inspite of being mildly sceptic, until we got round to removing the thin plastic film covering the lens of the camera. Inspite of being black, it looks sexy. But let me hastily add- not $exier than the orange one- J from Nokia, are you listening?! In another news, the husband has appropriated the phone without so much as a by your leave, the moment he came to know of a certain mail from Nokia. More surprises due! Now I have to wait for the weekend when the weekend husband arrives and I can lay my hands on the phone to review the OVI feature.



And I was waiting for a few more things to fall into place and while there is still some loops to be closed and the most important one that too, I am still happy that it progressed.



I recently got a review copy of Chanakya's Chants by Ashwin Sanghi, much to my delight. Thanks Kiran. I have already started reading it and it is the kind that makes you want to turn to the last page to sneak peak into what really happens in the end. Very contextual. I am eager to get to the end of the book.



Feb was really packed. We had a fun filled holiday with lots of work to do. And I made some much coveted and treasured purchases - including saris from Manmandir, Chennai- my favourite Sari shop. The good part is that these saris are unique. And they have class. I only wish I wore saris more often to justify the price. Take a look at one of them- a never-before-seen-by-me-anywhere-tussar with warli art. I have seen madhubani tussar but never a warli tussar. I fell in love with it at first sight as I was entering the shop. Clutched at it and never let it go even as I was making the other purchases I really came for.

I talked of the Universe conspiring. Yes, I attended the annual day- nothing was there to stop me. What they say be careful of what you wish for. I wished so badly for it that I got to attend it - fingers crossed. A proof that one doesn't know what is going to happen the next moment. I was to go to Singapore for a conference on Sunday afternoon. I was miserable that I would not be attending the Annual concert. Wednesday morning, I counted some foreign exchange lying with me to add to the cash I would take with me. I spoke to the school teacher checking if they are doing a dress rehearsal before the actual event so that I could take a sneak preview. And I come to office and get to know that I cannot travel. My passport expires in less than 6 months. The travel agents had told me that they would get me an emergency visa inspite of the 6 month problem, and they were unable to do it. Therefore I am not travelling. I was livid for a couple of days - I was so looking forward to going and the workshop was really supposed to be fun, but then suddenly, since yesterday, I feel at peace. Perhaps my kids are after all more important to me than foreign travel as I always thought! Maybe if it had been any other country I would have been down in dumps. But it does not hurt so much because it is only Singapore- where I have been to so often. May be this was the anti jinx the month needed because a lot more important stuff is supposed to happen in March.


Including a visit from the dear school friend NS! And the much awaited bonus which as a matter of fact I have already spent. And the Nokia surprise, not to forget. And the new book from Jeffery Archer which incidentally Indiaplaza is offering at just Rs 150 - the lowest so far- I have pre ordered mine. Have you?


So my dear readers, do do pray for me. I need all the prayers, all the push of good luck, all good words to the power above and lots and lots of do good vibes my way. Pray that all goes smooth for me!

And while we are on the topic of the passport... even tatkal takes a month to materialise- one goes online, fills the form, gets an appointment that may be 1 month away, then apply and wait for atleast 1 week to 15 days to get your renewed passport back. So ideally the travel agent should have instructed me in December to go for renewal instead of asking me to hold back.


Boo hoo hoo, I was so looking forward to the shopping 0rgy, eating, and what nots. And even though I have made my peace with it, everyone around me seems to be tch tching that so sad you are not going, it is going to be a lovely program, you are missing it. I start feeling sorry for myself even though I am not so much sorry for myself in reality. The Singapore colleague so endearingly said - I am so bummed you are not coming, that I felt like crying! Sob.


This post was drafted for 28th and due to some major problem in blogger my blog vanished and the post did not appear.

On Criticism

I really really hate it when people takes special care to critisize my choice.
To assess the worth of what I buy and declare (spitefully) that it is not worth the amount I paid.
For the worth of anything I buy is only for my eyes/ mind/ soul- not for any one else's.
It is different when I am trying to take help and I ask - do you think it is worth it? Should I spend my hard earned money on it?
The perception of worth is different for different people and so also their choices. If everyone were to select the same stuff, imagine how unidimensional the world would be.
I wonder, whatever happened to good manners, restraint and all that when admiring someone else's purchases.
Why can't one just say - nice and then keep their trap shut?
Especially when one can see clearly that I am very happy with my purchase and really see the value in it.

Beware, the Blogger is Observing

1. There is a lot many seats vacant in the airport. You need not sit right next to me or right behind me, forcing me to sit in perpetual fear of knocking my head against your oily hair or the elbow against your elbow.
2. Would you please move towards the centre of your seat? Rather than looming over to my side on your right?


3. No, I am really not at all pleased to see you. In fact, I want to smack your face at the slightest opportunity. So please do not grin and look at me trying to catch my eye.


4. Do not stuff your gills with the booze just because it is free


5. You B*&^h. Why did you allot me the aisle in the last row right next to the toilet when the row 12 was nearly empty?


6. And yes, I so want to hate you. You get upgraded because the airline made the mistake of double booking the same seat while I beg with pinched nose to move to row 12.


7. Oh no no no. Don't come this way. I am eating chicken and I really do not have the willingness to exchange pleasantaries with you. Shoo shoo, go away. Meet some one else.


8. Don't keep that fake smile plastered on your face while on the treadmill. Ah well, a half an hour walk and a jaunt on the EFX will cure you of that smile and soon you will be panting for breath. See, I told you so.


9. You don't know any of us on the dance floor. Then why the F are you photographing us while we are dancing. Just hang on till your people come on the floor.


10. 1 effing 50 Rupees for dry cleaning the kiddy coat?
11. No matter how much you jostle, the flight will not leave until I get in.
12. Put that arm down. My nose is insured. I do not want my sense of smell damaged because of your underarm odour

pl note- this post has been inspired from the jottings series at thirtysixandcounting

Passing Thoughts

Many posts have been brewing in my head for days. Thoughts are passing through, but I am just not penning them down here.
Maybe I am just being lazy or taking a break or perhaps these thoughts are so tiny that I am unable to build them into a post. Thoughts that consist of ....

...the most exciting happening for the month - the kids' annual day- and whether I will manage to be present or will be on a flight at that very moment or perhaps shopping till I drop at one of my favourite stores. Well, I had been lamenting for days that the annual day happens bang on the day all of us are travelling, but the world conspired- the annual day got postponed and the kids could participate.

...May be the world is yet to conspire some more and I might still be able to attend the annual day.

...The much awaited for break for a longish period. For me for obvious reasons- I am meeting my gang of relatives. For the husband because it is going to serve as an excuse to him for not taking us for a break for a long long time. What you don't believe me? Look into the archives. See the impressive number of vacations I have taken since last 2 years.

...A game of waiting...that I am playing since last Christmas...err this Christmas. Nokia people, if you are reading it, you know what it means. And maybe a few more people know what it means. But sweet anticipation and all that, it is getting a bit tiring.

....Sue's Thingie posts and what a wonderful idea for blog posts they are - I may do a similar thingie on -the many ways the husband annoys me! Ah now this may be a cue for a certain someone to pass judgement on how I discuss and disrespect the husband on my blog but then what does he know of a marriage to talk anything about mine- take that you loser.

...Of the husband's open offer to write on this site without payment and of how I got instant cold feet and became totally idealess- now if some money was involved then may be I could think about it.

...of facebook and how after a phase of being an addict and after utilizing it to the fullest possible, I am in a phaseout state. May be I will be back and may be I won't but I am certainly not adding to the friend list since last year. I am not even checking the friend requests. So if anyone felt offended, please do not, because I seem to be having less and less to share and most of the sharing happens on the blog anyway. But yes, I have had my fun. I have interacted, shared photos, posted smart status messages, caught up with friends old and new. I have even ranted and cursed people on FB- I have talked of stupid people, bid good riddance to them on FB and even prayed that karma comes to bite them morons in their ample butts. Amen to that.
But mostly I am disillusioned. Disillusioned that relations and friendship are judged based on being part of FB list or number of comments that one passes on a post/ photo. Or that even though a gang interacts on FB, none of them may be so enthu if some of the same gang would like to meet up. So I guess, I take it at "face" value henceforth.

...which also makes me wonder. Why the inertia if an old friend wants to meet up? Even if they just have to drag their sorry arses to a place close to their home, at their convenient time? Is it because after such a long time, we fear we have nothing in common? Or perhaps we never had anything in common and it is best left at that. Seriously, I have had better response through my blog friends. A dear friend coming to India from abroad has been trying so much to get people to respond to her reunion mails, but of no avail.

...Of the impending, looming larger than life, dreaded class I. I hear it is going to be very very tough. I heard some of the Sr Kg students are being held back for extra tuitions so that they come upto the accepted levels before they move to class I or stay back perhaps. I hope the kids can cope. And before that, the burden of the summer vacation. Summer vacations are a zone of conflict at home. The husband will not take a break so why would I take a break. So where do the kids stay- with me or with the husband in Pondicherry for the working week and be back on weekends? For much as the kids get on my nerves at times and the many smacks I have to give at various points of time, I simply cannot think of coming back home to an empty house without them or sleeping at night without them nestled on my arms or waking up to see them in funny sleeping poses. Simply put I need them in front of me. The last year we managed. I took a few breaks and few days they went to Pondicherry but this year, the breaks may not be possible.

And yes, while we are at it, go on take a look at this brilliant teezer thingie. These are tee shirt transfers that blogger friend MayG is designing. And she has made it look oh so easy for even klutz like me. Check them out. If you are in the mood for something different for your tees or your baby's onesies, take a look.
Or may be even iron these head noddable teezers onto a set placemats or coasters for your dinner guests....Think about it.

What Would You Do?

Let's say there is a project that needs to be done for school. Would you do it yourself or get the child to do it him/herself or let the child do it with guidance from your side?

Now suppose there is some internal competition within your building. With the possibility of getting prizes. Would you do it yourself and submit it on behalf of the child or would you let the child do it with or without your guidance?

Well, I pose these questions because we are in the process of organizing events within our building. We have told kids to come up with stories & logo designs for putting up on the medals that we plan to give away as gifts. Now one kid made a submission and I casually asked - did you do it? And he honestly answered - my mother did it because I have exams and because it is meant for age group above 6.

At that moment I had 2 choices- to keep the paper quietly and not consider it as an entry thereby not making any enemies or returning it to him asking him to re submit.
I was tempted to take the easy way out- keeping the paper with me so as to avoid conflict but my heart said - no that would mean sending out the wrong message to the kid. So bravely I told him- this is easily the best of the lot since your mother has done it. But then you are supposed to do it so could you please make something yourself, may be take your mom's help and then resubmit?

Simple, but it took me a lot of effort to do it as diplomatically as possible. I resited the urge to call his mother and explain my point of view. May be it means I will have one less person in the building who will look kindly upon me. But then I am glad I did what was proper.

Seriously I wonder whom exactly are they fooling? Themselves, their kids or us- the rest of the people or the organisers or the judges?

What I feel is that this is the best way to give a free hand to the kids. Guide them if you please but let them do it by themselves. The objective should not be winning but participating and giving their best.

Spiritual Gurus - Then and Now

I have been reading many versions of our epics for some time.
There is one thing which I noticed about the spiritual Gurus.
Many of the revered ones were not so revere-able in their prime.

Valmiki- the author of Ramayana was a hunter turned robber, an outlaw forced to rob to enable him to feed his family. When his family refused to be a party to the punishment of his sins, he decided enough was enough and became a hermit spending the rest of his days in austerities. He was revived by Narada who removed the Valmik- the ant hills from his body and therefore Ratnakar came to be known as Valmiki.

Vishwamitra- The first Sage- Brahmarishi Vishwamitra was a king known for his short temper and lust to possess stuff like the Kamdhenu cow for which he resorted to great violence. Ultimately he went the austere penance route to be able to become more powerful than Vashishtha muni whose cow he wanted to possess. During his penance the Menaka incidence happened!

Durvasa- the sage born out of Shiva's anger was impossible to live with. One one hand, he was deeply feared for his curses and on the other hand famous for his wonderful boons- Kunti who served him and took care of his unreasonable needs was granted the famous boons.

Shukracharya- A totally grey character. Very well learned, he had the knowledge of Sanjeevani mantra - that which revives the dead. He is known to suffer from jealousy with his brother, deep rooted misplaced anger against Vishnu and going over to the dark side- the side of the asuras.

Narad- The wise immortal sage was known as the perpetual strife maker, travelling freely between the 3 worlds. He was the one who persuaded the sons of Daksha to not propogate, and thereby angered, Daksha cursed him to be a wanderer.

There may be more, but these are some of the most famous ones.
That was about Then- and a then that was very very long time ago.

But what about Now?
The difference is that the notoreity happens after becoming a guru.
Without taking names, we do know of the recent and not so recent scandals that the spiritual guides are linked with. Some of them cannot travel abroad because of cases going against them. They are supposed to live a life of so called austerity but more often than not, their comforts are well taken care of. Sections of homes reserved for the spiritual guides every time they visit their home or devotion that takes the form of reserving a chair or some furniture permanently for the Baba and decking it up with silk angavastra. In fact the sons were greatly amused that the chair wore a sari and if at all it was a baba where was the head.
Giant pictures of the spiritual guide adorn the walls of the entire home and even puja ghar. Bhakts massage the guru's feet and take care of all his comfort.

Totally opposite of the hands-off approach that was the embodiment of spiritual gurus in the ancient times.

Yes but one thing is still common- the gurus as master persuaders- we marketing/ sales people should obtain lessons from them.
While they do have the power of knowledge and people believe in the because that is what they have made up their mind to do but there is also this skill of persuading and influencing.
Watch a Baba Ramdev session- you will be compelled to do the pranayam that he encourages you to do. A true sales man!

Signs of a Facebook Addict

I joined facebook very reluctantly. First it was for the sake of the many games like jumble or pathwords. I would open facebook just for playing the games. My friend list was very limited. And very restricted and private as I was not sure I could carry on so why add friends just for the sake of it. Second reason was to look at all the photos the family was posting which I was unable to view.

When I started realising the fun people were having interacting on this site and I started getting hooked on to it. Slowly the friend list went on an inclusive growth stage- so I added relatives, blog friends, school friends, college friends.... and so on until now I have a good number of friends though not really impressive.

Until sometime ago I thought facebook was for social networking. But now I observe it serves many a larger purpose.

So after a long hiatus- here is my notorious "list post" coming up.

1. Trumpet Blowing- happy about something? want to tell the world in general what you have achieved? Just post it on Fb and you will have a number of "likes" and "great work" and all raising your general happiness levels

2. Feel Good Factor Enhancer- Is it your birthday or any other special day- the automatic birthday indicator to your friends serve a great purpose- they will have friends rushing to wish you in advance so that they do not forget on the d day. So if people live on different time zones, in effect you celebrate your birthday from day -1 to day 0 to day +1.

and even if you suspect that people may miss wishing you- just start posting leading status messages- like, the hubby has already bought my gift or like the children made me a birthday card .... so on and so forth and people will be prompted to wish you

3. Support System- are you pissed off with something or someone? Are you going through a bad phase? Just post on fb and people will come in hordes to offer their sympathies or even bad mouth the objective of your anger with equal or more intensity

4. Annoyed? Do you want to indicate your annoyance? You could post something scathing and hope the person intended for reads it or you could subtly delete the person from your friend list. It is the ultimate insult to be deleted from the friend list and it is a parampara jo orkut ke zamane se chali aa rahi hai!

4. Paranoid?- suddenly you think that some of your friends might post something bad on your wall. Spill your dirty secrets while you are asleep (which means not online)? Give gaalis? Or take your pictures and morph them into something ugly and post it all over the net? But you are scared to "unfriend" them? Or worse, you want to secretly keep tabs on the going ons in their life but do not want to allow them to post anything on your wall?

Simple. Just restrict access to your wall, photos and all but cunningly keep them on your friend list thereby maintaining a one way communication controlled by you. And if the "almost unfriended friend" is just an idle gazer on fb and is not really comunicating with you, then even better- they needn't even know about your restrictions.

So what are your FB lessons? Let's expand the list.

Me? Scary?

Do I look so scary that the traffic cop had to send me away from the scene to enable him to peacefully ask the husband for a bribe?
Btw, we did not break that red light.

Obsessive Cleanliness Disorder

Hop over to Hip Hop's to read this post about queer people with OCD on Cleanliness.
It is strange to see such high levels of obsessive behaviour- so much that one doesn't even care about the comfort of the people living in the house.
To me the concept of cleanliness itself has evolved over a period of time. I come from the Northern part of India where it is not uncommon to walk all over the house with your "outside" shoes/ slippers. I never really thought it to be dirty especially because we do not really use the floor for sitting/ sleeping or preparatory cooking. And moreover, the weather does not permit us to walk bare foot at all.
When I landed up in the South, I was majorly irked by the concept of leaving the sandals outside - it is very common for North Indians to joke- wear any slippers and go, anyway you have to walk bare foot inside the house, so what's the point in wearing your strappy sandals to a party.
Or stuff like- I went inside and could feel all eyes on my feet- then I realized that I have walked in with my sandals.
Just imagine a new year bash inside someone's house and you saunter in a mini skirt, fashionable jewels and ahem... bare foot because you are forced to leave your chik sandals outside the door. Most annoying. Thankfully I haven't had an opportunity to attend such funky dos at anyone's home.
And more than anything else, half my self confidence goes off if my footwear is not right, or to rightly put it - absent.

When I first set home here, I did not have "rules" like shoes outside. But as per the practice here, people would leave their footwear outside before walking in, even when I explicitly told them to wear them inside. I found people happily plonking down on the floor when they came home. When kids happened and they were crawling all over the place, putting stuff including slippers in their mouth, the cleanliness dragon within me got unleashed. Today the rule is all sandals outside in the shoe rack that got specially built outside the main door like it happens in all decent self respecting South Indian homes! So I have finally joined the club!

But, the question I ask is- by keeping sandals outside can one really claim that the house is spotless? I have walked into "no chappal inside homes" and have come out with grime in my foot that takes a good scrub with soap and pumice stone to come off. I have seen people with feet that leave black marks all over because they walk bare foot in their homes.

And I have seen homes where you can eat out of the floor. Now that is the place I would inspite of myself, hesitate to walk in with grimy shoes.

Since I live in the ground floor, the dust flies in faster. You can find me obsessively mopping the floor whenever I see my kids' feet get even slightly blackened with dirt. Because I don't want any one to walk into my house bare foot and go back to their homes with dirt. To me it is the most disgusting thing that could happen to someone.

But of course, it only takes a demo from a vacuum cleaning company to make you realize how dirty your home is.
Infact a new outfit of homecleaning system that would make us poorer by a lakh rupees was demonstrated in our house. He talked about a continuous system that keeps sucking dust particles flying in the air.
I had one question for him- while all this sounds very good, what about when I am outside my home, do I carry this with me all around?
What do you think of shops that request you to leave your sandals outside?
Simple- I stop shopping there!

Lazy Lazy

August is such a lazy month for me- always. My mind is all over the place except where it is supposed to dilligently be.
To me it heralds the start of all that is festive - starting from my birthday- ah well, is it not about me always?
I start getting excited about all the forthcoming holidays.
The think about festivals is that the moment you take the compulsion away from it- it becomes easy to handle them. I have started to make my own rules for festivals. I do stuff which I can handle and at my own pace which makes it fun. At one level I had started looking at festivals as a day spent slogging rather than a nice peaceful holiday. But now, no longer so- because I do only the things that I enjoy doing - even if it means not spending time in the kitchen trying to make delicacies which I can't. (I still have not got over the nightmarish episode of burnt coconut laddoos of 2004 )

August is the month I begin to make giddy plans for the kids' birthday
Or start hoping for some Year end holiday

Work wise it is all about rushing to finish up the commitments
Year end conferences-cum-fun (zyada)
Fun activities like planning collaterals for the festive season wherein you get to go all bossy with the supplier side
If it is to be anything by last year's standards then I have a hectic last quarter to handle!

I have been a dragon this entire year. Together the husband and I have done the major part of home redecoration and all that we were talking about and not doing has been done. I have only chasing the electrician & plumber throughout the last couple of months because I decided I do not want to have even a single malfunctioning switch or a tap that need an arm wrestlers strength to close. In fact I have pushed the electrician beyond his limits and capabilities.

Yet again I have joined the gym to try to achieve the stretch goal that I set last year and my mind is all in it. In fact in my mind I have lost lots of weight but the scales don't seem to ratify that.

The kids' school start moving on fast track and I go all crazy trying to stay afloat.

At this rate I wonder- work-life balance is such a vicious cycle.

So what are your plans for the most exciting part of the year