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Friday, September 01, 2006

How To Be A Pain In The Neck

Nag Nag Nag- at all possible times
Repeat the same joke/ story/ incident many times in various settings- make the tale extremely long drawn, explore irrelevant angles, talk in a very slow speed and simply rip the topic apart- all the while not letting the other person manage a word in between
Eavesdrop and then pass a comment or even join the discussion even if you think it is not meant to be a public forum
Have your favourite oft-repeated punchline like when I was in xyz college/ company/ country
Do enthusiastic class participation in all meetings- do not let the speaker continue in his tempo- keep debating every sentence. If someone tries to ask a question, quickly rephrase that and pretend it was your query
Do all your private fights/ romance on a public phone- like office/ hostel phone- make sure everyone in the vicinity hears it. after that you could even cry publicly
Send meaningless and heavy forwards especially the ones which give the warning as to how many people you should send it so that you get instant love/ good news on the job front
Look at the negative side of every incident- keep complaining about everything under the sun
Always have a pronounced frown on your face or the "all of you are stinking rubbish" look or on the contrary be diabetic sweet with every one.
Instead of settling things amicably be rude, pick up a quarrel or accuse
Show off
Be un-cooperative
Always come late for any meeting and if the meeting has started, ask for a quick review
Talk about only 1 topic everytime and with everyone- like how bad your workplace is or what is the latest on your pregnancy or child rearing skills or how wonderful your child or other half is or some other of your current favourite topic

Painkillers anyone???


artnavy said...

The latest cause-
Ask a working mom " how can u leave ur child and go to work? "
Ask a stay home mum" Dont you feel like working?"

Nee said...

Oh dear! I hope these are all irritating qualities in different people and that no single person you know possesses ALL of these attributes!

Twisted DNA said...

That's a really nice list :)
Ask somebody you met in the movie theatre, "Did you come for hte movie?"
Every time somebody is getting coffee, tell them why coffee is bad and why you quit

Hip Grandma said...

Good ones.interesting.

The Visitor said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
The Visitor said...

:( I am guilty of quite a few things on
that list :(

Sorry - that was a wrong link - I couldn't find the right link :(

The Kid said...

I heard that the best way to gain someone's irritation is to not agree with them when they are talking about their problems. Like if someone is pained by their boss and wants to talk about it... just say: "oh.. but he is such a nice guy!".

itchingtowrite said...

artnavy- yaa irritating when people ask this question whenever they c u come back from a long day at office.
nee- welcome to my blog and keep coming. these qualities r gathered from various episodes- some of them mine too!! esp hubby wud agree to the 1st one as mine
TDNA- ha ha just tell them no i was selling tickets in black and have made gud money out of fools like u who come to watch movie!!
hey visitor- what's the link u r talking of
the kid0- good strategy- hope no one tries it on me!

The Visitor said...

I couldn't find the link :(

The Visitor said...

Hi ITW - I got the link that I was looking for - related to your post, "How To Be A Pain In The Neck" - Reasons to slap me.

the_outsider said...

Thanks for your comments on my blog.
Are you thinking of anyone in particular when you wrote this ?.
Maybe the boss :-)