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Thursday, September 18, 2008

Factual Fiction Marries Tiny Thoughts- Guilt

This weekend, she walked out of the house with her husband, the guilt enveloping her yet again.
Saying she is going to the doctor for an injection.
Gosh. She thinks. The kids are going to grow up with the memory of "our Mom used to be sick very often when we were younger"
In self-justification she counts the total number of hours she spent with them today barring the 3 hours she spent in the kitchen shooing them off after giving impromptu hugs and kisses on demand.
How quickly feed-on-demand has changed to lift-on-demand, she reflects.
'Tomorrow I am going to come back home early from office to make up for taking off without them this weekend." She vows yet again, as she has done many times in the past...
-Everytime when she saw them howling, standing at the window whenever she left home for work.
-When she went off with her husband for a movie during her anniversary
-When she stayed a day extra in Delhi to simply shop when she went on tour
-When she went for another late night party
Each day she vowed to come back home early or on time and got delayed by traffic or some email or phone call.
Every weekend she would think that she would wake up early and finish the cooking so that she would be able to give exclusive time to the kids after they wake up.
The guilt trips never end, do they?

8 comments:

Monika,Ansh said...

Hey, it's OK dear. It's the same with all of us working mothers & it is unfair to stop taking those little pleasures . But, yes, the guilt always happens , but it gets better coz as the kids grow up, they have their own priorities & freinds :)

Mamma mia! Me a mamma? said...

Sigh! The guilt is never-ending, but the beauty of it is their innocence...extra kisses, an unexpected outing and their world is alright again!

Mama - Mia said...

:)

all in good time lady. there will be time we might eb standing at the window waiting for them to get back!!

so dont fret about doing your own thing every now and then!!

hugs

abha

Monika said...

I guess guilt is part of all working mothers life... we eat guilt infact when we breath we breath guilt but trust me its imp to take these breaks to be able to give them our best

Shobana said...

Hugs :)

phoenixritu said...

No the guilt trips never go away when they are small .... and then they grow up and wish you leave them alone LOLLLL. Its the circle of life. So quit worrying about it, its important to be a happy and busy Mom, not a clingy and depressed Mom

Itchingtowrite said...

monika, ansh- and then we feel neglected!

MMMaM- so heart wrenching- they r so forgiving

Mama mia- yes, i miss them if they r not there for a short while also

monika- yay!!


shobana- hug u back!

phoenix - oh yes!! no one else cud make it so clear like u!!

DotThoughts said...

I pray it gets beter when they grow up because I am in the same boat!