1. I judge those who do not value time- keep others waiting remorselessly, don’t care for their time and nor for other’s, exceed their presentation time limit and believe that the longer they speak, the clearer their message. Includes trolls like clients who believe that the supplier deserves to be treated like shit, doctors who walk in fashionably hours late (regularly, not one off case mind you) and then give audience to medical representatives or take long phone calls, bosses who allow phone calls to interrupt important meetings like appraisal.
2. I judge those women whose prime occupation is being a door mat. The things they love to do is cook for the family and the friends, force feed you, fill your plate with mounds of stuff that you were better off not eating while you were looking away, not allow the people to remove their plate and put in the sink but grab it from them, ask you all sorts of questions centered around food- what did you eat, what you will eat, what did your wife cook for you for breakfast, lunch & dinner, what did you eat at the party, are you hungry, the baby is hungry (say this every 1 hour or less- believe me). The end result of all this will be food served by her for you, your kid, your friends, the driver, the maid, the watchman and then packed for you to take it home. They will make your bed for you, spoil you rotten, fold your clothes, tidy your cupboard, pick up after you, spoon feed you, tie your shoe laces (yes), wash your undies, you name it and they do it for you like a genie. They never allow their kids to be self sufficient or responsible and make them a pain in the backside for their wife/ children/ room mates in the hostel.
3. I judge people you don’t value money or things bought out of money- they give it to every undeserving beggar in the street, buy the most expensive thing in the name of good taste (I call it foolishness, not to hunt for a good bargain if it is available), over order food and then waste it, tip over handsomely to appear uber generous, prevent others from driving a bargain, prepare humongous quantities of food and then pack up for every person they see (why do they tend to forget that those people are perfectly capable of cooking their own food and may not even like your style of cooking) . If you don’t respect wealth, wealth will never respect you.
4. I judge those girls who think all boys in school/ college are staring at them and trying to make a pass at them so they don’t want to go alone to the water tap or to another class or across the play ground.
5. I judge those who are uncaring for the environment in the name of convenience or forgetfulness- forget to switch of the fan/ light, convenient to take a print rather than do it on the computer.. well if it was your own paper and your own printing machine would you go so easy on paper or do hundred screen edits before taking that print?
6. I judge credit stealers- peers, bosses, friends who bring out the I word when we was more apt. 2 classmates of ours had to go for a paper presentation. After round 1 she comes and says “my paper got selected”. After round 2 she says –“we lost”.
7. I judge filthy tongued people who cannot digest their food without using swear words, dirty ones that too. I wish for them that their kids use the same words for them.
8. I judge people who chose only extremely dull colours for themselves and then judge others who are comfortable with bright colours. Look at your own tastes first before judging others tastes. Includes people who do not believe in dressing up for the occasion. Always visible in their filthy nightie or the ugliest clothes inspite of calling people home for dinner. C’mon, move it! Make an effort to look presentable.
9. I judge people who don’t read. How can they deprive themselves of the charms that the books/ magazines provide? Even if you read only the level 1 of books and are not into heavy reading, please read. Broaden your avenue.
10. I judge people who are glued to TV every waking moment. So much so that they don’t hear what’s going on.
11. I judge people who cannot multi task.
12. I judge people who spend long hours on the phone at the dining table / when guests are around.
13. I judge self appointed BBC. They want to be the 1st one to tell the news to everyone even if it does not belong to them or is not too sensational- who is pregnant, who came home, what milestone did the kid achieve (let the poor mother/ father do the honours). Included are those who published the Harry Potter spoilers. GROW UP AGAIN! WHY RACE?
14. I judge those mothers who try to be one with the crowd with their sons or daughters. They want to be present at every function, every dinner party, every gathering of friends, want to be included into every conversation, want to know every dirty secret or sordid love affair about the friends. Grow up and find your husband or friends to supply you with nasty gossip.
15. I judge uncles who try to boisterously back slap you on every occasion or even try to play holi with you or ask you why you have painted your nails. (my scorpio sis pinched one such uncle and kicked him hard when he tried playing holi with her, verbally applauded by another onlooker uncle who commented- who said you are supposed to play holi with daughters?).
16. I judge parents who don't have time to play with their kids - with books, toys, puzzles.. if you don't then who will nurture them?
17. I judge people who are sloppy about their work- if you have taken it up, do it, format it well and take the effort to make your work presentable.
18. I judge those relatives and friends who don't make the effort to stay in touch and then taunt- oh now you remembered me when I call them up.
19. I judge those who create a big fuss at any photo opportunity. You need to coax them to come for the photograph. Beauty Queens
Pant pant pant.....this is exhausting... And I also judge those who don't take up the tag-collection of stars, suki, lumi, just like that, minka, nm
Meanwhile, are my HP obsessed eyes playing tricks on me or do you also see the likeness? (Tejas is going to kill m for this)